In the Mourning
It's been nearly a year since my nephew, Brandon, passed away. A dreadful anniversary to keep. But it's impossible not to. It doesn't seem like a year has gone by.
I know my sister's family has suffered a multitude of negative emotions - shock, sadness, depression, frustration, anger, helplessness, anxiety, grief, loneliness, guilt and regret. I'm sure there are more that I'm unaware of.
Moving on without Brandon has to be the hardest thing. They're still grieving his death every day.
Grief and mourning go hand in hand but I find this definition interesting...
Mourning: the expression of deep sorrow for someone who has died.
They have deep sorrow because they loved him deeply. They're "in mourning" for Brandon, his life and what his future might have been.
Simply said, they miss him. They miss his smile, the sound of his voice, his laugh, his jokes, his personality and his big hugs. They miss everything about Brandon. I know they'd give anything to reverse what happened and have him back safe and sound.
There's a song that I love called Give Me Jesus. The lyrics include these lines...
In the morning when I rise, give me Jesus.
When I am alone, give me Jesus
When I come to die, give me Jesus
You can have all this world, just give me Jesus.
When you love Jesus - you completely relate to this song. There's nothing in this world that comes close to what He is to those who love Him. I know that Brandon loved Him in this way.
The thing is that even death, grief and mourning were suffered by Jesus and He understands the depth of suffering we experience when we lose someone we love deeply.
Jesus wept. John 11:35
If you read the whole story this verse is from you will appreciate this little play on the words of the song...
In the mourning when you rise...
Jesus wept because his dear friend Lazarus died. He mourned and felt the emotions of the loss.
But you will also discover that He allowed His friend to die. He could have gotten there sooner and saved Him but He chose to glorify His Father instead by raising Lazarus from the dead.
There was purpose in what He allowed to happen.
I'm confident Brandon is raised to new life in heaven. No doubt. We don't understand why God allows things to happen (or the purposes) but when we place everything in the powerful hands of Jesus Christ, we will rise even in the mourning.
So, when hearts are still broken even after a year and it seems the tears will never end just remember that Jesus wept, too.